What is happiness? Am I the only one who asks myself if I’m really happy or if I’m enjoying life to the fullest? Sometimes it just feels like there should be (more).
You too? Tell me, what is happiness to you? Not what it means in general, but what would your life look like if you were happy? (Go ahead, let your mind dream a little).
Ok. Hold on to that.
I found myself asking myself this question a couple months ago (and continually since).
I was sitting in my garden, still dormant, not yet planting time yet, on a cloudy day and asked myself, what would you do if you did exactly what you dreamed of doing this year? It's a dreary day and I had found myself in a daze and was trying to revive my mind. It came to me quickly, I would plant a big garden of flowers! Which is exactly what I'm doing this year. In fact, I'm pouring my heart into it with the goal of having some of the prettiest cut flower kinds for bouquets that I can think of. What else? Love my family and friends really well!! And serve others around me.
Whew! What a revelation. You want to know why? Because, sometimes the thing we dream of doesn't feel like what we dreamed of. Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't. I still wake up feeling unmotivated and have countless "blah" days. You? Is that what you thought it would feel like? What's the cure?
I want to take a moment to ponder this because it would be easy to say that the reason why we’re not as happy as we wish is because we’re not thankful enough or we’re not making the most of what we’ve been given.
I've often scolded myself for having a longing on my heart that is not happening right now. Or feel that I must be off track if I find myself in one of those "blah" days not appreciating the greatness of the things I've already been given. However, something that I have within that I think is true, is the longing to experience the "fullness of joy" that Jesus talks about in John 15. I think that we are made for it. This life doesn't seem to be made for "just settling" or monotonously living. Is this a longing that the rest of the human race feels too? I'm guessing so. I wonder if our approach to finding it is off though.
These are two things that I think we have misconstrued a bit as Christians:
1. "There is joy in thanksgiving, so make a list."
It is incredibly true (and biblical) that when we find thanksgiving in our hearts we also find joy. Why? Because we are incredibly forgetful beings and being reminded of the good things God has done brings hope and encouragement to our souls. However, I think we have simplified this wisdom down to merely making a list in our heads of good things. The sky, God's love, running water, family, friends, food. Those things can definitely liven your mood, but I don't think we're getting the whole picture friends. I think what God means by this is that we need to have conversations with him about things! Yes.
Life is hard to understand sometimes. Our journey of faith is hard to understand at times and that's exactly what I think it is; a journey. The path to trust sometimes involves a long period of doubt and questioning. I think it is important for us as a church to realize that what makes our faith unique is that we are allowed to question. Because you know what? That which is true will stand its ground, and therefore God is not threatened by our questions. In fact, I think he invites them.
You know what questions lead to? Conversation. It invites God into the situation. It invokes trust. We need to have daily conversations with God, because we need to understand what His plan is for us each day in order to know how to live each day. We need to know what he's doing, what piece of the puzzle we're living and how he wants us to respond. Something a list of blessings doesn't quite accomplish. Imagine if we spent daily time in the presence of the Lord listening to him, letting him remind us of the parts of our story he has already accomplished, leading us to thankfulness and filling us with peace. What if, instead of scolding ourselves for our doubts, we learned to come with him with questions.
What I have felt the Lord saying to me is that joy is a daily work and found at the foot of the cross in conversations with Him. I need to align my heart with His, I need his insight, and his peace. So is thankfulness the key to joy? Yes, I think it is, but found in close friendship with our sweet Father.
2. "Jesus is our happiness, nothing else satisfies."
Jesus is all you need. This is one of the most confusing concepts. Yes, but I need food and friends and I feel pain and heartbreak. As a young adult, seeking out my salvation, I have felt before, that when life is hard, I should forget everything and focus on Jesus. That it's almost wrong for me to want things like friends and dreams because "all I need is Jesus." I don't think this is true. I have found that at times when I lack, the Lord is drawing me near him and can teach me very wonderful things. However, I think that though it's true that we will never find fulfillment in earthly things, even when our greatest dreams are accomplished (marriage, wealth, job), those things are still important! It's important for us not to totally disregard the desire divinely placed within us to "work the garden (Eden)" or to build and create things. These are God's handprints that he placed in us. He places dreams and aspirations and a desires to succeed within us, so these things should matter! To him and to us.
So, when everything in your life seems right but you feel unsettled it's ok to pay attention to that. Have conversations with the Lord about it. Ask him what it is. If it's a longing you believe he gave you, then ask him what you should do with it in this season. Remember that some of God's greatest deliveries were long-awaited and the hope and anticipation built within his people were equally as important. Yes, Jesus is enough for you but he also created you with desires to succeed in this world. When those things are hard let Him grieve with you and give you hope.
“If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.”
*Amazing what is found in this verse before "...that your joy may be full." Obedience. What an important piece of information. The Lord is showing us that the key to fullness of joy is keeping his commandments. Amazing. Lord, help us to do that in humble communion with you.
If you’re living the life that you thought you wanted but you feel unsatisfied, take time to be thankful and find joy, and also ask yourself what is on your mind. Is there something there that needs to be acknowledged? Jesus cares and these questions you have right now are probably an important part of your journey.
This is my wish to you and constant voice to myself - Have daily conversations with the Lord, walk through life hand in hand with Him, aligning your heart with his, and determine to enjoy life! Sometimes things don't happen the way we wish they would but there are a lot of things that we can make happen!
And within that leisure (and God's will :) - { Do what you want to do! } - If there is something you want to do like take a vacation, have a fun picnic, spend a weekend at the beach, have dinner with friends, spend a night out by yourself - then do it! Sometimes we put barriers between what we wish to do and our lives because of time or budgets or energy but then when we have the resources we don't do them. Do them! Make it happen next week. Just do it.
Love you,
